Babies Over Boobies.... Kinda Like Bros Before Hos

I don't like to write about J too much because I've realized that on occasion he reads this blog and since I usually write lovely things about him, I'm worried that his head is getting too big. Like his internal monologue is something like, Oh, I'm so great. She lurves me so much. Which is all true, but sometimes it's important to keep boys in check.

Anyway, last Friday he was able to finish work early, and we made plans to go to the Olive Garden. Tres fancy, I know. My brother and his soon to be wife gave us a gift card to the OG for Christmas. Anyway, we had a really lovely lunch, and he laid this lovely gem upon moi.

SC: So, you know yesterday when I was talking to my grandfather? He was asking me about M & A, right? And I told him that M had broken up with A because A was too jealous, and she wasn't at all hip to that (there's more to the story, but not suitable for my grandfather's delicate ears). He asked me if they would get back together, and I told him all signs pointed to no. Anyway, he then said that when my grandmother was young, he used to have to fight the boys off with a stick.

(J laughs)

SC: No, really. He said that some guys look at pretty women really disrespectfully, like they're eating them up, and some guy looked at my grandmother like that so he clocked him in the nose so hard that he broke the guy's nose and ended up getting blood on his shirt. And then he said, "With a body like M's, no wonder A's jealous of boys looking at her."

Hmmph.

SC: So I don't really get it. M is really pretty, but her body's nothing outta this world. She's all J LO-ish. Curvy bootie, thick thighs. What is it about that body type?

J: I know YOU like to be skinny, but guys like something round and juicy. (He puts his hands up and pretends to squeeze).

SC: Bub, you do know that in order for my boobs to be bigger, everything from my belly button to the bottom of my bootie has to expand exponentially? And I really want bigger boobs, but not at that price.

J: I like you better bigger.

SC: No, you like my BOOBS bigger. There's a difference. Ugh, if I wasn't so scared of surgery, I for sure would get my boobs did. That way, no matter what size I was, THEY would be a good size.

J: You know how I hate fake boobies.

SC: But I wouldn't get them super big. I'd just get like a full B. That way they'd be more natural.

Then he said this, which I loved and have been thinking about non -stop like a crazy person without his meds.

J: I would much rather spend $6000 (I think it costs way more than that, but you know boys never have a real idea of what things cost) on trying to have a *baby than making your boobs bigger.

Am I crazy? Is this no big deal? I just really thought it was sweet. Babies over boobies wins. In my book anyway.

*I have fertility issues. Or infertility issues. Let's just say, baby-making issues. And it's all me. Because J's been checked out, and he's a.o.k.