I'd Like to Thank the Academy....

I lurve being a winner! Especially when I didn't even know I was nominated! Angela Darling gave me this! How sweet is that?

Thank you! You like me! You really, really like me!

So, thanks!

R.I.P., February 19th -February 28th, 2009

You may remember that I set my Macy's card on fire when I bought this lovely bracelet last week. It was so beautiful! I would take it out of the box and wear it around the house.

Today, I had some errands to run. I got myself all prettied up, and I decided to wear my bracelet. Why only wear it on special occasions? It cost more than any other piece of costume jewelry I'd ever owned, and I thought I should wear it whenever possible.

And I lost it. :( I am so sad. There are no words. And even though I'm pretty sure I lost it at Target, I have no idea where in Target I lost it. I may have lost it while I was testing out a hula hoop (please don't judge me, it was $7.99, but I did not buy it), or while I was choosing sunscreen, or while I was looking for the cheapest alarm clock.

And really? It was so beautiful, I seriously doubt someone would return it. The flowers came together to form a heart on the inside of the bracelet, and the heart held together magnetically. No hook and clasp.

So. R.I.P. I barely knew you, but I loved you truly.

Confessions of a Reformed (At Least for the Duration of Lent) Shopaholic

Oh, lordy. Word on the street is that Lent began yesterday. You know, the whole 40 days/40 nights of sacrificing something -hey, Jesus sacrificed food for 40 effing days (Gosh, I would've been homicidal, using my god powers for all sorts of crazy shizz), giving up one thing should be no big, right?

Anyhoodle, since I've become a Christian, which is pretty much Catholicism without the ritual and about none of the guilt, focusing more on a personal relationship with the big G.O.D., I don't really keep up with Catholic rites of my youth.

But I really love the idea of Lent.

So yesterday at the gym, a fellow gym-goer was bemoaning, quite loudly I might add, the fact that she had given up sweets for Lent. She regaled me with tales of eating six doughnuts in five minutes (like I would be impressed, *rolls eyes) and J is giving up ice cream. Which, I reminded him, he doesn't even eat every day, but he told me he'd been having a craving for it. And then he asked me to stop at Publix and buy him a pint. And although I totally get bingeing before starting the cleanse, um, no.

So I thinked and I thinked and I thinked. What could I possibly give up? What do I LOVE to do that I could consider a sacrifice? Hmmmm.

I don't know about you, but I was stumped.

Um, well, not really. Obviously. I know what I love more than anything. What would really hurt me (but would definitely help my bank balance and my closet).

I have to do it, cookies. I am giving up shopping for Lent.

I've tried to give it up about three times in the past, and I've only experienced success once. But for God? For Lent? I'm really going to give it a go.

But I couldn't give it up without one last binge. I mean, I had no idea Lent was starting. I had no time to prepare! It's like not studying and having a test. It's like, not being able to wear your most perfect-est dress because you didn't shave your legs. Or like going on a diet before cramming yourself full of delicious gazillion calorie treats. Or going to rehab before one last eight ball (or something like that. everything I know about drugs I've learned from Intervention or Celebrity Rehab or Lindsay Lohan updates on Perezhilton.com)Or like deciding to take a hiatus from shopping without buying yourself one last little something. Ahem. *coughs.

I could NOT start Lent cold turkey. I would NOT start Lent without some planning.

So I bought myself this:


In white, too!



And, um, this:




And in teal as well (it really is much cuter in person). *has the decency to look embarrassed.


Do not fret my cookies, I had a 25% off coupon.


And so. Lent starts....NOW!

How about you? How are celebrating this Lent-astic season?


Cheater, cheater pumpkin eater. Books will not count in this whole ixnay on the oppingshay business. Gosh, I'm not shopping, I might as well be reading.

Pooped

Too tired to write my own thoughts -I've got a great one about Lent, but tomorrow cookies, tomorrow, I thought I'd redirect you to this little gem.

My friend Claudia just wrote the most HILARIOUS blog entry about getting a haircut -which looks fricking awesome, by the way! Totally Team C. I'm SO jealous! My hair would look like this if I ever cut it short:-Sally Field, not Julia Roberts (wasn't J.R. so cute back then? my word! she's gotten so douche-y ever since she stole that poor woman's husband). My hair is frizzy and poufy, and goodness I would look like a mushroom. Very unattractive.

Anyhoodle, it's so funny, I wish I would've written it. Minus the, um, haircutting part, which I guess defeats the purpose. It's genius, and if I ever write a book, fiction or memoir-esque, I am definitely including it.

Enjoy!

Because I'm Paranoid

Hot damn! I'm removing all my posts (at least the most recent, most blatantly obvious) about the LeDouchetards. I've got some incriminating smack, and even though I write under a pseudonym, I don't want this shizz to come back and bite me on my heiny.


So if you read it, good. And if you didn't, no big. Happier times are ahead, my friends. Happier times. :)